Waking with consequences
by Saesama
Summary: Getting drunk can have dire consequences, as Cid, Vincent and Yuffie discover. Strange idea, first FFVII fan fic, CxVxY, Read at your own risk.


You know those ideas that wedge their way into your head and don't let go until you finally write them down? I got one of those the other morning. It refused to leave me alone until I more or less finished writing it out. Yeah, it sucks, quite badly, but it provided me with some hella-funny mental images. The basic idea is waking up with the wrong people and having to deal with the consequences. Slight yaoi, I guess, if you think about it. I don't know if you WANT to think about it…..I may write what actually happened the night before some day, if enough people actually like this and want to know what happened between the three.  
  
***  
  
Vincent came into consciousness bit by bit. The first thing he registered was smell. Strange, slightly stale, currently unrecognizable. The second was that he was holding someone, while someone held him. Ok, he was on his side in bed with two others. And he was completely nude, covered by only a sheet.  
  
The hell?  
  
The person he was holding was small and slim and stretched out against him, back to his chest, his flesh arm around them, small breasts pressed against his forearm. He opened his eyes slowly and carefully looked down. Short black hair met his sleep-clouded vision.   
  
Yuffie.  
  
Naked in bed with him.  
  
Shit.  
  
The other person held him in a similar position, their front to his back. Male, broad-shouldered, shorter than he was. What felt like a stubbled face was pressed into his neck. Listening, Vincent registered another sensation, sound. Yuffies' light breathing, and a slight, familiar snoring from the person behind him. He knew that snore from sharing a room with one person since he'd joined the group.   
  
Cid.  
  
Also naked in bed with Yuffie and him.  
  
Double shit.  
  
Explanation please?  
  
Vincent furrowed his brow and tried to piece together the night before. He remembered checking into the Inn; remembered sitting up in his room, bored; remembered Cid suggesting they go down to the bar for a drink; remembered Cid laughing when he ordered wine, saying that was no drink, and changing the order to rum and Coke....then things got fuzzy.   
  
This could NOT end well.  
  
He suddenly recognized the smell. Cigarettes and alcohol and sweat and sex. A combination he hadn't smelled since his Turk days long before he had met Lucretia. He was pulled out of his thoughts by Yuffie rolling over in his arms, making a small noise of frustration as she met the barrier of his chest. "What the heck?" she muttered, her eyes opening. She looked up, her eyes widening. "V-v-vincent?" she squeaked.   
  
"Th' fuck?" Cid grumbled from over Vincent's shoulder, propping himself up on one arm. He rubbed at his face then opened his eyes. They went wide as he realized who he was sleeping with. Yuffies eyes went even wider upon seeing the pilot.  
  
Vincent mentally sighed. Three.....two.......  
  
"HENTAIIIIIIS!"  
  
One.  
  
Yuffie reacted purely on instinct, twisting sideways and slamming her feet into Vincent, shoving both men to the floor. She kneeled on the bed, clutching the sheet to her body and staring at the two on the floor. Cid swore loudly as Vincent landed on him, still trying to figure out what was going on.   
  
"Yuffie, please, calm d-" Vincent started.  
  
"EECHIIIII!!" Yuffie shrieked. She reached over the side of the bed and whipped the first thing that came to her hand at Vincent's head. What ever else she was, the girl had wicked good aim. Vincent felt his boot pass through the upper layer of his hair as he ducked.  
  
"HEY!" Cid snapped, the metal tipped boot narrowly missing his shoulder. "Who you calling pervert?"  
  
"You bastards...." Yuffie fumed, glaring at them. "You dirty lechers...."  
  
Cid narrowed his eyes. "Watch it, kid." He warned.  
  
"YOU watch it!" Yuffie snapped, pointing at the two still on the floor. "You-you...child molesters!"  
  
"WHAT?!"  
  
Vincent grabbed Cids arm as the pilot lunged for the ninja on the bed. "Unwise, Highwind." He said coolly. "That will only make things worse."  
  
Cid turned to glare at the ex-Turk, taking in their nudity in a quick glance. "How much fuckin' worse could it get?" he asked.  
  
"If the others come in to witness this fiasco." Vincent snapped. He turned his red glare on Yuffie. "Both of you better calm down. Now."  
  
Yuffie huffed and wrapped the sheet tighter around her lithe frame, leaving only her head visible. "Fine. Calm." She said flatly. "Now what the hell is going on?"  
  
Cid snagged a pillow to give himself some modesty while Vincent dragged his cloak across his lap. "Obviously," Vincent said flatly, "We all had far too much to drink last night." He sighed and briefly ran his hand through his hair, attempting to push it from his face. "The result seems to that we...."  
  
"Came back and screwed each other sober." Cid finished.  
  
Yuffie's eyes widened again. "You mean," she said slowly "That you got me drunk then did-did THAT?!"  
  
"We did not get you drunk." Vincent said flatly. "You got yourself drunk."  
  
"How do you know?" Yuffie asked, her voice slightly hysterical. "You probably can't remember a damn thing!"  
  
"Can you?"  
  
Yuffie frowned. "I remember getting bored," She said slowly, "And wandering around, seeing what there was to do in this place, and then coming across the two of you half drunk at the bar, then sitting down, then....I dunno."  
  
"So it was you're own damn fault." Cid said, glaring at the young ninja. "We didn't force you to do anything."  
  
"But then why are we here, for Da-Chao's sake?"  
  
Cid frowned. "No fuckin' clue."  
  
Vincent looked around, troubled. The room was not the one that he and Cid shared, that room had two single beds, not a large double and a single in the corner. He squinted at a pile of packs in the corner.   
  
Oh, hell no.  
  
"Yuffie." He said slowly, forcing the other two to break their glaring contest to look at him. "What were the sleeping arrangements for you, Aerith and Tifa?"  
  
Yuffie blinked at this apparently random question. "Well, I won the straw-draw," she stated "So I got to sleep in the little bed alone, while Aerith and Tifa shared the big bed. Stupid hotel didn't have enough beds....." She trailed off, looking around. "This...can't be good."  
  
"I agree."  
  
"What the hell are you two talking about?"  
  
A wry smile flitted across Vincent's face. "I hope," he said dryly "That Aerith and Tifa had the sense to get out of here early on."  
  
Cid's jaw dropped. "We're in the GIRLS' room?"  
  
"Apparently."  
  
Cid stared at Vincent for a moment, then groaned and covered his face with one hand. "I swear to never, ever, take a drink again." He muttered.  
  
Vincent furrowed his brow, forcing his poor brain to remember how they had gotten there. All of them, drunk. Leaving the bar, staggering upstairs. Stopping before Yuffie's door. Cid and Yuffie, kissing furiously, slamming against the door, Cid pulling Vincent after them. A brief image of Aerith and Tifa, looking quite frightened and bolting. Then Cid pulling him into a passionate kiss as his cloak was unbuckled.  
  
"We managed to walk you to your room," the ex-Turk said slowly. "Then things...happened. Tifa and Aerith left, probably ending the night in OUR room when they realized we were not going anywhere for a while."  
  
Yuffie tightened the sheet around her shoulders. "This," she muttered sulkily. "Is NOT how I wanted to loose my virginity." She sent them a gray-eyed glare. "'specially not to a coupla guys I actually have to deal with until this Meteor thing is over." She groaned. "My Dad will kill me if he hears about this."  
  
"Yeah?" Cid snapped "Well, we'll see you in hell then, cause Vin and I are going to end up paying dearly for not being able to fuckin' control ourselves. Aerith and Tifa'll have our heads." Yuffie bit her lip. The two older women probably would kill the two men, for kicking then out in such away if not for sleeping with Yuffie.  
  
"Fuck, Yuffie." Cid sighed. "I'm sorry about this, I really am. Sorry I can't keep my damn hands to my self, and for puttin' you through this."  
  
"I apologize as well." Vincent said quietly, looking away.  
  
Yuffie bit her lip. The last thing she had been expecting was chivalry from the two. Most one-night stands she'd heard of ended with one partner or the other simply saying pffft, you're on your own. She hadn't stopped to think that Vincent and Cid were in as much trouble as she was, if not more. Cid was twice her age, and Vincent was, technically, nearly twice that. Some of the others, especially those with higher morals, would probably skin the two alive. "I'm the one that needs to be sorry." She said. "You two are the one's everyone's gonna blame, not me." She sighed, unable to look at either of them. "Well, we may as well face the music. Turn around, I'm getting dressed." The two men obeyed, turning their backs to the girl.  
  
Yuffie paused a moment, studying them. Seeing Vincent without his cloak or Cid without his jacket was rare enough, seeing them shirtless was almost a treat. Yuffie had to admit that they were attractive, both in different ways. Cids broad back was tanned an even honey color, with a light spray of freckles across the shoulders that made Yuffie smile in spite of herself. Years of hard work on heavy machines showed itself in his muscles and a few thin scars on his arms. Vincent was the perfect contrast, pale and silky smooth, his black hair falling across his shoulders, near his waist in places. She noted that Vincent's shoulders were only a little less wide than Cids and only looked thin because he was so tall. The muscle in his arms was less pronounced than the pilots, even though he had proved several times that he was probably the strongest aside from Barrett. They ARE good looking, she thought. The thought brought her out of her musings with a blush. Hurriedly she leaned over and fished her clothes out of the haphazard pile on the floor.  
  
A few minutes later Yuffie was tying her bandana around her head, her arm-shield tucked under her arm. "Um, well," she said nervously. "I'm gonna go try to explain a bit to Aerith and Tifa, or at least keep them from completely crucifying you two." She twisted her hands together, feeling incredibly awkward.   
  
To her surprise, Cid laughed, although it was a bit humorless. "Or at least stall 'em long enough for us t' get out the back door, huh?" He flashed Yuffie s short grin over his shoulder. "If y' don't see us for a week, come t' Rocket Town. We'll prolly be somewhere in the rocket's engine room, living off stale donuts."   
  
Yuffie actually laughed. Vincent gave the pilot an odd look. "Stale donuts?" He asked, raising a brow. "You keep stale donuts in your rocket?"  
  
Yuffie giggled harder. "The truth comes out." She said. "The REAL reason Shinra 26 never left the ground!"  
  
"Get the hell outta here." Cid growled, his eyes laughing. "'Fore I stuff you in the rocket's fuel tank." Smiling at them, Yuffie left the room. Cid sighed, the laugher dying. "Well, this is a fine fucking mess. May as well get it over with." Vincent didn't answer as they got up and sorted out their clothing, resolutely not looking at each other.  
  
Within a few minutes they were more or less dressed and as ready as they were going to get. "Well," Cid said heavily. "See you when we reach hell." Vincent gave him a very slight smile as he reached for the door knob.   
  
Later, Vincent would compare the impact to being hit by a truck. A very angry Tifa towered over him, one foot planted firmly into his stomach. An equally angry Aerith stood over Cid, her staff very near his neck.  
  
"How could you?" Aerith fumed. "You leeches, how could you? I thought the best of you, I really did, but then you go and do THIS."  
  
"Getting her drunk," Tifa continued "Then coming up here and kicking US out so you can rape-"   
  
"I raped no one." Vincent said coldly. "You have three seconds to get off me, Lockheart."  
  
"You GUYS!" Yuffie said, pushing past Aerith into the room. "C'mon knock it off, they didn't do-"  
  
"You don't have to stick up for them, Yuffie." Aerith said coolly. "Even if they threatened you into not telling."  
  
"Bullshit!" Cid snapped. "We wouldn't even try to pull some stupid shit like that!" He grabbed Aerith's staff and wrenched it away from his neck. "I have a thing about not hitting women, but you are coming very close to making me break it." He snarled.   
  
"So you won't hit women," Tifa said coldly "But you will-"  
  
"Stop, stop, stop!" Yuffie shouted. "All of you! Girls, they didn't rape me, cause rape is, what's the word, non-consensual, and I'm the one that started it! It was my idea!"   
  
They all looked at her in shock as she blushed furiously. "Yuffie," Vincent said quietly. "You don't have-"  
  
"It was my idea." She said firmly. "And I'm to blame as much as them. And they didn't hurt me at all or force themselves on me or nothing like that. I-I-I enjoyed it!" Her cheeks were now an alarming shade of red. Aerith and Tifa stared at her in complete disbelief. The silence was broken by the sound of loud calling up the stairs for them all.   
  
"This isn't finished." Tifa said coolly. Vincent found himself hauled up by his shirt front and tossed roughly into the hall, narrowly missed by Cid as they hit the far wall. They looked at the door that just slammed them out, then at each other. Selfish, childish Yuffie had taken the blame? Cid opened his mouth to comment, but was interrupted by Cloud coming up the stairs. They pushed off the wall and made their way back to what was originally their room to collect their packs.  
  
**  
  
They generally divided up into three teams while traveling. One team was usually Cloud, Barrett and Tifa, the second Naniki, Cait Sith and Aerith, the third Yuffie, Cid and Vincent, mainly because the people on these teams could get along without ending up killing each other for two or three days at a time. Today, the next town wasn't far, and all three groups were going to split up and take slightly different paths. Yuffie had grabbed Cid and Vincent by the arms and practically dragged them off before Aerith or Tifa could make any suggestions that the three shouldn't travel together and lead to a few strange questions.  
  
Cid felt quite awkward as he used his spear to push aside tall grass, making a path across a large meadow. He, Vincent, and Yuffie had barely said a word to each other all day. The few times they would look at each other they quickly turned away with pink cheeks. If the others didn't yet know about the night before, they would before the end of the day. Cid was NOT looking forward to staying at the Inn tonight.   
  
"Who's up for just camping out tonight, then coming into down tomorrow?" Cid asked. "Give 'em time to cool down?"  
  
"Won't work." Yuffie said sourly. "They'll just assume you guys got me in a secluded field somewhere and decided to have some fun. They'll come hunting us down with death on the mind."  
  
Cid snorted. "Then they'll trip over us in the middle of the night and yell at us because they were stupid enough to sprain their own ankles."   
  
"I can see it now." Vincent said dryly. He raised his voice is a fairly good imitation of Aerith. "'Oh Yuffie, what did those jerks do to you now?' Holding you while the others proceed to beat the shit out of Highwind and I."  
  
Cid grinned. When Vincent's' sense of humor did come out, it was rare and at odd moments. However, it rarely failed to make him laugh. "Fuck it." he said. "We'll just have to deal. C'mon, the town should be just over this ridge." The three scrambled up the slope, then down the other side. The town lay just ahead. So did a very irked-looking Cloud and Barrett. "Shit." Cid muttered.  
  
"Could we speak with you two?" Cloud asked coldly as the three approached. He looked at Yuffie, his eyes softening a bit. "Alone, please."  
  
"Bull." Yuffie said, her hands on her hips. "I don't know if Tifa told you two, but Cid and Vin aren't to blame. Now get out of the way, we're tired and wanna go rest."  
  
"You don't have t' stick up for 'em, kid." Barrett said. "They need t' face the con-"  
  
"Look!" Yuffie snapped. "I'm not hurt, I'm not in shock, they didn't hurt me at all, even if they were drunk! They were kind and gently and didn't force anything and I enjoyed it, ok? And I'm sick of you all deciding to be all high and mighty and being the jury on this! So I slept with Cid and Vincent, so what? Don't I get to have a little control over my own life?" She turned and grabbed Cid and Vincent by the hands, dragging them towards the Inn. "C'mon. I'm tired and standing here isn't going to help anything."  
  
"Yuffie," Vincent said as they walked. "You didn't have to stand up for us like that."  
  
"Stand up, nothing. I was telling the truth." She replied. Her cheeks went slightly pink. "I've been trying to remember exactly what happened last night all day. And I was telling the truth when I said I enjoyed it." She looked at them, almost shy. "I don't know how you two are alone, but together you're a pretty damn good team."  
  
Cid felt his face go as red as a tomato, and he noticed Vincent fighting back a blush as well. Yuffie laughed at the looks on their faces. "And you're both cute when you blush, too."  
  
"Ok," Cid growled. 'Now you're just being provoking." He shook his head as they climbed the steps into the Inn. "Damn kid." He muttered. 'Trying to embarrass us like that."  
  
"I ain't a kid." Yuffie said, glaring at the pilot. "You should know THAT, at least. Well, I'm going to bed. Night!" She stood on her toes to kiss them each on the cheek before disappearing into the Inn.   
  
The two men blinked, then looked at each other. "Y'know," Cid said. "I ain't ever going to be able to look at you the same way again."  
  
"The feeling is mutual." Vincent replied. "And I believe Yuffie feels the same way." He shook his head slowly. "I would find this amusing if I wasn't a part of this."  
  
"I'm part of it," Cid said, grinning. "And I still find it funny as hell. Lets go, I wanna actually get some sleep tonight." 


End file.
